Navi and I finally did it!

5 or so years ago I set out with the plans on buying a baby horse and taking them from start to finish myself. In late Nov 2012, Navi came home as a 1 1/2 yr old blank slate. Flash forward to now. She turned 6 this year and yesterday we took our 1st "trail"ride with a couple other horses. I can't believe come November of this year I will have owned her for 5 years! Wow, time really does fly!!

To say this road has been smooth sailing would be a bit of a lie. Her and I have had anything but a smooth ride up to this point. Navi and I have not seen eye to eye a lot of the time. But I just had to learn to listen to her and go with the flow. All plans have been thrown out the window about a hundred times. I was planning on starting her lightly on trails at the age of 4, but then as we know she tried to cut her leg off. That was a year of healing and not knowing if she was going to even come back sound to ride. So we dabbled in the world of driving. (Which I do plan on still doing) It was decided she was sound for at least light riding so at the age of 5 we started under saddle training again. Except this time around, unlike when she was 3, she was not easy to ride. She started kind of throwing fits when I would get on her. I feel like I changed the way we did things 500 times in hopes of finding a non-stressful way of getting her going under saddle. She pushed my confidence to the brink and made me think hard of ways to find a partnership with her. More than once I said I didn't think she was ever going to be a riding horse. In fact just this year in early spring, my partner and I finally just said nope her being a trail horse isn't going to happen. I made the decision to just focus on riding Pixie and enjoying the summer. Navi of course would never leave us. She would always have a home with me, but I decided to take a break from regular training. We were doing well for the most part, but I had to find my confidence and desire to continue to try and push through this road block when it came to riding. I have always struggled to find my way with Navi cause she pushes my buttons. And lets face it I have always had an easy out as long as I have had Pixie around to ride. I didn't need to push myself. Well then Pixie came up lame again in the beginning of June. I had 3 choices: 1. Not trail ride 2. Buy another trail horse 3. Step up to the plate and just ride Navi. Here is how this decision was made. It was quickly decided I am already poor so another horse was out, lol. I could go the summer without trail riding, it wouldn't be the end of the world, but I could also see if Navi and I could work this out and hopefully hit the trails. So it was decided it was time for me to just saddle up and ride her. I have great medical insurance, so heck why worry about it. I got my helmet and and last weekend I climbed aboard after months of not riding. I waited for the blow up, the rearing and or bucking. It never came...so ride two I waited again and it never happened. Then ride 3 this week. I pushed a bit more she got mad, pinned her ears, tossed her head,but never blew up. What happened here? Had I finally figured out how to connect with this mare and ride? Had I just gained my confidence and said the heck with it? I am not really sure I know the answer, but I do know I wasn't nervous one bit on her last night. I know I can ride and for the most part I can ride through a blow up. And well I have a helmet.

Why are all my horses slow??

So there we were on our 1st trail ride. We actually were out a bit farther from the barn, but I decided it was best to not take pictures and focus on my riding. Well up until the end when I couldn't resist. :) We rode over a bridge, she was perfect! We rode past horses in pastures that wanted to come see us, she did great! We tackled a tiny hill or two (really tiny) and she did great! I don't think someone could have ruined my excitement if they had tried really really hard. I could have cried when I dismounted at the tack room I was so happy! This moment was one I had waited for for a long long time. Our journey is far from over, we have so much more to do. And we will hit many more curves and bumps along the way while trail riding, but until then I am enjoying the moment.

Crazy Horse Owner

Everyone knows the world is full of "crazy" horse owners. No one wants to be one, but the truth is we will all become one at some point. 😊

I feel as though I have officially become one, lol. Don't feel bad for me, I enjoy my little stressed out world. However, you should feel bad for the barn employees where my horses are kept. Because not only am I a crazy horse owner of 1 horse, but we of course have 5. You know that means we are crazy times 5! Which means the poor people that take care of my horses are subjected to 50 thousand texts a week. All of which probably include " okay we are going to move so and so or can you check on so and so..." Oh yes, I am that person who freaks out and will text at 6:30am to please check on my horse when I am told the night before that he is sore on his feet. I am also that owner that decides to move their horse and then two weeks later needs to move her back to her original paddock. Or I need to dry lot my horse this month, but next month she needs to be moved to a different pen with more shade. The last text I sent Friday to the manager said "Don't worry I think I am done moving horses for a while" Ha! 24 hrs later my other half and I are talking about that we need to move Pixie to a different pen. I assume they know to no longer believe me when I say things like that, lol. I want my horses to graze 24 hrs a day, but I don't want them to get fat ( Hey that is kinda like me, I want to eat all the time and stay skinny??), lol. Oh and here let me have special hay boxes to feed my ponies out of so they can slow feed.

I keep my horses 47 miles away from my house, why? Well because I am that crazy owner and no where closer to me even comes close to my standards of care! Why don't I buy land you say and keep them at home? Because I can't afford to have such nice pastures for them. They need space to run, graze, have a year round live creek, and have shelter. I am sure if I do ever buy land and take my horses home every employee at the barn will be throwing us a good bye party 😝 Ok, I don't think they will be that excited to see us go, lol.

The first step in any problem is admitting you have a problem. No worries, I know I have a problem.

In all seriousness though, everyday I am so beyond grateful for the ranch that my horses live at. I couldn't ask for a better place or better people to care for my babies. Every time we go out there I feel blessed that we are able to call that place home for our horses!

Now I am off to get errands done so I can get the ranch early to figure out a game plan for where Pixie will be moved to. Pixie is lame again, so I need to find a perfect combination of somewhere she can graze, but not get fat again, but can move around more than her current situation. Willow has a cut on her neck that I want to check on. I need to get Navi dressed in her fly sheet now that she isn't in the big pasture with tons of shade to protect her from the sun. Jess and Char... well I think they should be good to go for the day. They will get their one candy cane they get each time we visit. It is super tough being a retired horse of mine. You have to walk to the fence when we arrive to receive your candy cane. What, you say, you can buy candy canes year round?? Oh yes, no worries you can always find them on Amazon or cracker barrel 😉.

Admitting Defeat

*Warning this is not a nice post* And it may ramble on a bit...

As a Positive Reinforcement trainer, I get my methods criticized all the time. And that is okay, because in the end it makes me a better trainer and friend to my horses. However, what I don't handle well is the never ending comments from people about how it is okay to be mean to horses because they are big and they can kill you. Some days I just want to say fine! I give, you are right. It is perfectly okay for us to be harsh and cruel to another living creature out of our own fear.

Below are just a few responses on Facebook after I posted about a horse being pushed past his threshold as the reason he went to bucking. Actually I will put my response and then follow it up with the comments. I am leaving the names out of the comments in response to mine.

Sarah Shipman "All I see is that poor horse getting spurred and yanked in the mouth because he was pushed past his threshold... Sigh. I know I am probably a lone in this thought, because it is always the horses fault never us humans that push them to that point. As usual I see fear and pain in the eyes of a animal and others see it as funny. Maybe some day humans will stop being so cruel, but I am not holding out hope. Don't want to argue with anyone... I have said my peace."

1) "Not really, kinda got to get after a big animal like that otherwise they're likely to kill ya. I'm all for compassion. But I know I'll sink a spur in ones side if they go to buckin on me."

2)" If ever in doubt about correcting a rank horse watch a herd establish its hierarchy___ was reaching back to try and bite ___leg and I didn't believe ___. So when I took ___out, sure enough, she reached back for my leg and after meeting the sole of my boot she never did it again. Horses are powerful amazing animals. For us, the joy of the ride with the powerful animals is being prepared for when things don't go quite as expected. I've never met a bombproof horse immune to a freak day in the ring or on the trail. It's part of learning to protect yourself and the horse when things get out of control." 

To me what happened in the video was the guy was trying to stick out a wild ride,but the real problem to me is the fact that the horse was pushed to that point. Only one other person watched the video and gave feedback as to why the horse was bucking in the 1st place. Everyone else was just impressed with the riders ability to stick it out. Which he did do a good job of staying on. As the person in the 1st comments states they are all for compassion, but... this is what is wrong with our society. There is always a "but" attached to the words compassion when it comes to animals. I will be very honest in this post and say it is days like today that I feel defeated. I see just how many cruel people are in this world and I feel like I will never make a difference. I want to plant a seed with as many people as I can and use positive reward training on humans too, but frankly humans make it hard!  I struggle to have empathy for humans because for the most part they don't have empathy for anybody else. I have given up hope that humans will ever have compassion for any other animal. 

I started writing this blog in 2012 when I got Navi 4 years ago almost to the day. I had hoped that in the last 4 years I would have seen a difference in how humans thought. But now I have my doubts that we will ever change. Although truthfully how can I ever expect change when you have big time horse trainers such as Clinton Anderson that openly say, sometimes you have to kick a horses ass to show him who is boss, and that he hopes the bit-less tree hugging people get themselves killed so he doesn't have to deal with them... AND people still give him money! So I finally admit defeat! I throw up the white flag. I finally understand how people that think like me become so bitter. So often others tell them they should be kinder to humans if they want to get their point across, but there in lies the problem. Humans don't listen to kindness. For a long time I was willing to be accepting of things that I wasn't really accepting of to seem not extreme and to not be thought of as the "crazy" person, lol. But I am over it! Call me crazy, call me dumb, call me a tree hugging crazy bit-less horse person. But all that is okay because at least I can't be called heartless and cruel. (when it comes to animals at least, I am the 1st to admit I can be heartless when it comes to humans) 

Meanwhile if you need me I will be out riding the trails with Pixie in just a halter( or maybe without) and I will be working on riding my 5 year old horse at liberty. Don't worry I will try to keep in mind that since they are big they might decide to try and kill me because I am not being harsh enough. Remember though I do have boundaries with my horses and require manners, odd I know since I use treats *gasp*. 

I leave you with this question...Why is it okay for us (humans) to cause pain to an animal, but it is not okay for them to cause us pain in return? 

Trail riding without the Halter!

Our 1st time on the trails with just a neck rope.

Yesterday my partner and I hit the trails with Willow and Pixie. It was the perfect fall day and the ride was awesome. In fact everything was going so well that I decided to take off the halter for the last part of the ride. After we made it down the very big hill I took off Pixie's halter. Well okay I first checked with my other half to see if we had a clicker with us. I wasn't going to trail ride at liberty and not have a clicker. Safety! After getting my clicker the halter came off and off we went. Okay maybe she had to eat a little grass before we could start walking, lol. I will admit when we came to our 1st downhill section I was a bit nervous. I had no reason to be as she was perfect as she slowly went down the hill. This was a dream come true for me and now I know the possibilities are endless. However as with every big milestone I discovered lots about myself and my riding.

Here is some of the things I learned:
1) I have control issues (okay, okay I knew this before, but it really comes to light on the open trail with nothing on the horses head.)
2) Control issues = micromanaging
3) I didn't realize just how much the idea of reins made me feel safe.

So yes, it was very obvious to me just how much I seek control when riding the trails and how much mental reassurance the reins give me. In the beginning every time I wanted to change direction I immediately picked up the neck rope instead of asking with my seat and legs first. Funny I would do this since I have ridden at liberty in the arena more times than I can count. But habits are ingrained in us!  I found myself once again trying to steer with the neck rope when we reached a spot where we had to cross the gravel road to get back to the grass (she likes walking in the grass) however we had to avoid ditch too. But I caught myself and put it down, and said ok Pixie I trust you to not put us in the ditch. And guess what we made it around the ditch, lol. As I knew we would,but as stated before I have control issues.  The first time she broke into a trot to catch up with Willow I once again went straight to the neck rope to try and slow her down. Oh wait that isn't her cue to stop when we ride at liberty. Ha...she did slow down but did not stop. Okay, let me try the actual cue...I took a deep breath and relaxed and she stopped immediately. Good girl for listening when I actually used the right cue! Good girl for making me use the right cue!

I found that when we got closer to having to cross the road to get back home I was nervous. Why? I don't know. As I told my partner I knew she wasn't going to run away with me, but for some reason having reins gave me a certain level of comfort. And I never realized just how much my mind relied on those reins. Maybe because I knew there was no room for error or not listening when it came to crossing a road where the speed limit is 65. It was crucial she listen. We approached, she stopped and waited for traffic, and then we crossed on cue. She was perfect. It was important that I made sure I used the right cues! By the time we made it back to the driveway to the ranch I was super relaxed and had figured out how to use the correct cues, lol.

 It was nice having my partner there to remind me to put down the neck rope. That the whole point of me riding at liberty was to not have reins of any shape or form, lol. Oh yeah... I guess that is the point huh. Funny how the minute you step out of your comfort zone you forget how to do things like ride with your seat and legs. Or as my partner reminded me giving up the last ounce of control is something I struggle with.

Here is the thing. It isn't or shouldn't be about control, it should be about a partnership. Seeking this partnership with Pixie is my ultimate goal, but to get there I have to learn how to give up the control and let the partnership happen. I am still learning about myself and how to become a better partner to Pixie. The feeling of riding at liberty on the trails was the ultimate high for me. It was something I never thought I would be able to do.  (On that note, please don't go out and try to ride at liberty on the trails without the proper training in place.)

The moment we started walking on the trail without the halter, I remembered back to when I was standing in the round pen in tears with Pixie thinking I am never going to find a way to connect with this mare. Yet I did, and here we were riding at liberty on the open trail :)

It Takes Time

Navi and I had an "ok" day yesterday while working. I wanted to introduce targeting the cone from a distance so I can send her to target while we ride at liberty. We of course are starting on the ground,but even then I found that I frustrated her and she would head toss and even reared up once. I of course made her move her feet, no rearing up around me allowed. However, I needed to look at what I did to cause it. And truthfully I wasn't sure. My other half helped me figure it out and we then went on to end on a good note. Overall the session went well, but I still couldn't help but some what feel defeated at the end. But then I talked it over with my other half who reminded me it takes time. And we will get there, and when we do we will be one heck of a team. I have to remember we have only been working on the liberty riding for about three/four weeks now. It seems like so long, but when you only work a couple days a week on it, that really isn't that long. I have to remind myself it took A LOT of hours with Pixie.

 I can't expect Navi to be perfect, but yet for some reason when we have a bad session I feel like a failure. I don't know why, maybe because I feel like after 4 years together we should be farther than we are. I should stop comparing our progress with others because their journey isn't ours. And she is a baby and I have to take that into account. Maybe because I struggle so hard to find a way to connect with her. I feel like I should be able to breakdown her behaviors and understand her perfectly,but I can't and as someone who has trained lots of animals that makes me feel like I failed. I don't know why because I know that as a trainer you always learn something from every animal, and you never stop learning. It could be that  I am putting too much pressure on myself and then in return I put too much pressure on Navi to be perfect.

I think the hardest part about my style of training is that sometimes allowing the horse to have a voice is hard. It goes against everything you are ever taught when it comes to horses. When I decided to try liberty riding with Navi it made me very very nervous. I was taking away all control I had of her. Of course I am still nervous to a point, but not nearly as much. I think some fear is healthy it keeps me from getting hurt, lol. But taking away control from me is exactly what I needed to do. Because I lived in too much fear of getting hurt while riding her. I wanted to micro manage her with the reins, and that was just going to frustrate her. We were going to end up butting heads at some point, and I didn't want that.

It is funny that I often tell people your journey is your own. What you and your horse do together is what is important, not what other people think you should be doing. Maybe I should take my own advice and stop comparing my journey with Navi to others. That is just it, our journey is ours...frustrations and all :) My journey with each of my horses is different, and I need to accept that.

One of the good things about blogging  my adventures with my horses is that it allows me to stop and reflect. I can really analyze what has happened and what I need to do going forward.  Well off to the barn to see what is in store for Navi and I today :)

Facing my Fears

Almost 4 years ago I set out on an adventure to take a young horse from start to finish. But here is the thing I wanted to do it with clicker training and breaking away from traditional methods. While there has been set backs due to injury, one of the bigger issues is my fear. Many times I have made mistakes and attempted to go back to what I knew in the form of traditional training. And it isn't that it has failed me, but I didn't get the results I wanted. Yesterday I wanted to try riding Navi again after our 3 week break. I found myself to be very very nervous. I wish I wasn't so worried about getting hurt, lol. Darn getting older! She did very well when I laid over her and we took some steps, but when I went to get on again she was nervous. Why? Well I can only assume she was feeding off of me. So I decided I needed to go back to what I do best, liberty work. While we had taken a very soft approach to teaching Navi to ride and we definitely stepped away from traditional training,but it still had its components of traditional methods. I was using tack, and my partner to hold her and be my back up on the ground. Safe right, except when Navi felt like she didn't want me to ride and decides to blow up. Had she yet, not really, but I didn't want to risk it. So I decided to go to liberty work and take off all the tack. If I wanted to know how she felt about riding, I had to give her a choice. So off we went for me to face my fears. I was going to get on her at liberty. No halter. I have a hard time trusting Navi and we can have a battle of wills at times. But I think I am the cause of that. She knows that I don't trust her fully and how can I expect her to trust me if I don't trust her. It was a lesson I had to learn with Pixie and one I needed with Navi.

The moment that I sat on her at liberty was a wonderful breakthrough moment with us. It was the 1st time I actually felt that I have put my trust into her. She choose to let me get on her and stayed perfectly still until I slid off the other side. We did it multiple times and ended on a very good note!

I have always thought my finish line with her was when she became a trail horse, after all that is why I got her. I wanted to take a horse from the ground up to a trail horse. For a long time I thought riding was out and we were going to tackle driving. (Which I am still planning on, I think she will be great at it). However, now I realize getting a finished trail horse shouldn't have ever been my end goal. Finding a partnership should have been. It didn't matter what we did in the end as long as we were working together. I do think we will be on the trails and driving in the near future, but first I have to work harder on finding my trust in her.  


https://www.facebook.com/sarah.shipman3/videos/10202129873604992/

A link to our video of lining up at the mounting block at liberty.

The Truths We Must Face

What happens when our egos take over when we are working with our horses? This is a question I ponder and think about quite a bit. It happens to me, in fact it happens to all of us.

I had a friend as me a few days before my demo with Pixie this last week if we were ready. My response was "all I know is that animals keep us humble." Why was that my answer, well because it is the truth. Horses and all animals will keep our ego's in check.
My demo went exactly as I thought, not the way I planned it, lol. Pixie was good, did she do everything I asked? No, she did a lot of her own thing just as I expected. She did stay with me and lucky for me didn't blow me off since I wasn't breathing and I am sure I wasn't being as clear as I should have been. We have had many many better days at bridle-less riding when I wasn't trying to show something to an audience. Why was I nervous to demo something that Pixie and I do all the time? Plain and simple I felt like it  if we messed up it would make my training methods look bad. I feel pressured all the time to defend the way I train. I know for the most part people aren't judging as much as I think they are, but that feeling is still there deep inside of me. That is my ego talking, saying you have to prove something when I really don't. And so what if we had messed up, isn't that part of being human. My other half and Willow went out and did a liberty demo too. They were outstanding. Why? Because they didn't have an agenda. No set plan, nothing to prove. They went out and played just like they do when they are alone in the arena. Just as every session should be with our horses.
We get caught up in our agendas when we work with our horses,but we need to remember that just going out and enjoying what we do is the most important part. Our ego's push us to try and prove something to the world causing us to do things we normally wouldn't do. I battle with this all time when it comes to Navi. I find it hard to admit that I struggle with her and her training.

So what happens when we let our ego's take over? My opinion is that we start to use tools in a way we wouldn't normally. Or we use tools such as whips,spurs, etc... I have always been open as to how I feel about these tools and have admitted to the use of them as well. The horse world has become a world of having to prove that you can make your horse perform better than someone else.  I am not against showing, but I am against using what ever means necessary to win even if that means hurting the horse. I see it time and time again. The horse doesn't do what is asked so we resort to pain as a way to get what we want. How is that not our ego getting too big. The moment we feel it is okay to cause pain to another living breathing animal because we feel like they have to do something for us so we can prove our worth to another person. Why is it okay to use another animal as a stepping stone for ourselves?

 5+ years ago I saw a video of Clinton Anderson and his horse, Mandy, doing a liberty demo and at that moment I said that I wanted to get there with Pixie. Now I can safely say I do not want to be there with Pixie. I want to be different. I want to ride her bridle-less down a trail some day, and I know that day will come (that is my ego talking) . However I also know that it will not go as planned, and we will probably never make it out of the hay field. (And that is how Pixie keeps me humble) I could use force and pain to get to this goal, but in reality my goal isn't to prove that I can do it, but to prove that I trust my horse and I have worked hard to have a partnership with her.

 I had to face some very hard truths this past week. I had to draw a boundary line in what I am willing to be a part of. I cannot say one thing and do another. If I want to truly grow and evolve into a softer trainer I must following my own advice. Everyone has their own journey, and it is up to them to find a way to follow along that path. Sometimes finding the right path is hard and it is never a straight line to get to where you want to be.