Navi and I had an "ok" day yesterday while working. I wanted to introduce targeting the cone from a distance so I can send her to target while we ride at liberty. We of course are starting on the ground,but even then I found that I frustrated her and she would head toss and even reared up once. I of course made her move her feet, no rearing up around me allowed. However, I needed to look at what I did to cause it. And truthfully I wasn't sure. My other half helped me figure it out and we then went on to end on a good note. Overall the session went well, but I still couldn't help but some what feel defeated at the end. But then I talked it over with my other half who reminded me it takes time. And we will get there, and when we do we will be one heck of a team. I have to remember we have only been working on the liberty riding for about three/four weeks now. It seems like so long, but when you only work a couple days a week on it, that really isn't that long. I have to remind myself it took A LOT of hours with Pixie.
I can't expect Navi to be perfect, but yet for some reason when we have a bad session I feel like a failure. I don't know why, maybe because I feel like after 4 years together we should be farther than we are. I should stop comparing our progress with others because their journey isn't ours. And she is a baby and I have to take that into account. Maybe because I struggle so hard to find a way to connect with her. I feel like I should be able to breakdown her behaviors and understand her perfectly,but I can't and as someone who has trained lots of animals that makes me feel like I failed. I don't know why because I know that as a trainer you always learn something from every animal, and you never stop learning. It could be that I am putting too much pressure on myself and then in return I put too much pressure on Navi to be perfect.
I think the hardest part about my style of training is that sometimes allowing the horse to have a voice is hard. It goes against everything you are ever taught when it comes to horses. When I decided to try liberty riding with Navi it made me very very nervous. I was taking away all control I had of her. Of course I am still nervous to a point, but not nearly as much. I think some fear is healthy it keeps me from getting hurt, lol. But taking away control from me is exactly what I needed to do. Because I lived in too much fear of getting hurt while riding her. I wanted to micro manage her with the reins, and that was just going to frustrate her. We were going to end up butting heads at some point, and I didn't want that.
It is funny that I often tell people your journey is your own. What you and your horse do together is what is important, not what other people think you should be doing. Maybe I should take my own advice and stop comparing my journey with Navi to others. That is just it, our journey is ours...frustrations and all :) My journey with each of my horses is different, and I need to accept that.
One of the good things about blogging my adventures with my horses is that it allows me to stop and reflect. I can really analyze what has happened and what I need to do going forward. Well off to the barn to see what is in store for Navi and I today :)
Sunday, October 30, 2016
Monday, October 17, 2016
Facing my Fears
Almost 4 years ago I set out on an adventure to take a young horse from start to finish. But here is the thing I wanted to do it with clicker training and breaking away from traditional methods. While there has been set backs due to injury, one of the bigger issues is my fear. Many times I have made mistakes and attempted to go back to what I knew in the form of traditional training. And it isn't that it has failed me, but I didn't get the results I wanted. Yesterday I wanted to try riding Navi again after our 3 week break. I found myself to be very very nervous. I wish I wasn't so worried about getting hurt, lol. Darn getting older! She did very well when I laid over her and we took some steps, but when I went to get on again she was nervous. Why? Well I can only assume she was feeding off of me. So I decided I needed to go back to what I do best, liberty work. While we had taken a very soft approach to teaching Navi to ride and we definitely stepped away from traditional training,but it still had its components of traditional methods. I was using tack, and my partner to hold her and be my back up on the ground. Safe right, except when Navi felt like she didn't want me to ride and decides to blow up. Had she yet, not really, but I didn't want to risk it. So I decided to go to liberty work and take off all the tack. If I wanted to know how she felt about riding, I had to give her a choice. So off we went for me to face my fears. I was going to get on her at liberty. No halter. I have a hard time trusting Navi and we can have a battle of wills at times. But I think I am the cause of that. She knows that I don't trust her fully and how can I expect her to trust me if I don't trust her. It was a lesson I had to learn with Pixie and one I needed with Navi.
The moment that I sat on her at liberty was a wonderful breakthrough moment with us. It was the 1st time I actually felt that I have put my trust into her. She choose to let me get on her and stayed perfectly still until I slid off the other side. We did it multiple times and ended on a very good note!
I have always thought my finish line with her was when she became a trail horse, after all that is why I got her. I wanted to take a horse from the ground up to a trail horse. For a long time I thought riding was out and we were going to tackle driving. (Which I am still planning on, I think she will be great at it). However, now I realize getting a finished trail horse shouldn't have ever been my end goal. Finding a partnership should have been. It didn't matter what we did in the end as long as we were working together. I do think we will be on the trails and driving in the near future, but first I have to work harder on finding my trust in her.
https://www.facebook.com/sarah.shipman3/videos/10202129873604992/
A link to our video of lining up at the mounting block at liberty.
Thursday, October 13, 2016
The Truths We Must Face
What happens when our egos take over when we are working with our horses? This is a question I ponder and think about quite a bit. It happens to me, in fact it happens to all of us.
I had a friend as me a few days before my demo with Pixie this last week if we were ready. My response was "all I know is that animals keep us humble." Why was that my answer, well because it is the truth. Horses and all animals will keep our ego's in check.
My demo went exactly as I thought, not the way I planned it, lol. Pixie was good, did she do everything I asked? No, she did a lot of her own thing just as I expected. She did stay with me and lucky for me didn't blow me off since I wasn't breathing and I am sure I wasn't being as clear as I should have been. We have had many many better days at bridle-less riding when I wasn't trying to show something to an audience. Why was I nervous to demo something that Pixie and I do all the time? Plain and simple I felt like it if we messed up it would make my training methods look bad. I feel pressured all the time to defend the way I train. I know for the most part people aren't judging as much as I think they are, but that feeling is still there deep inside of me. That is my ego talking, saying you have to prove something when I really don't. And so what if we had messed up, isn't that part of being human. My other half and Willow went out and did a liberty demo too. They were outstanding. Why? Because they didn't have an agenda. No set plan, nothing to prove. They went out and played just like they do when they are alone in the arena. Just as every session should be with our horses.
We get caught up in our agendas when we work with our horses,but we need to remember that just going out and enjoying what we do is the most important part. Our ego's push us to try and prove something to the world causing us to do things we normally wouldn't do. I battle with this all time when it comes to Navi. I find it hard to admit that I struggle with her and her training.
So what happens when we let our ego's take over? My opinion is that we start to use tools in a way we wouldn't normally. Or we use tools such as whips,spurs, etc... I have always been open as to how I feel about these tools and have admitted to the use of them as well. The horse world has become a world of having to prove that you can make your horse perform better than someone else. I am not against showing, but I am against using what ever means necessary to win even if that means hurting the horse. I see it time and time again. The horse doesn't do what is asked so we resort to pain as a way to get what we want. How is that not our ego getting too big. The moment we feel it is okay to cause pain to another living breathing animal because we feel like they have to do something for us so we can prove our worth to another person. Why is it okay to use another animal as a stepping stone for ourselves?
5+ years ago I saw a video of Clinton Anderson and his horse, Mandy, doing a liberty demo and at that moment I said that I wanted to get there with Pixie. Now I can safely say I do not want to be there with Pixie. I want to be different. I want to ride her bridle-less down a trail some day, and I know that day will come (that is my ego talking) . However I also know that it will not go as planned, and we will probably never make it out of the hay field. (And that is how Pixie keeps me humble) I could use force and pain to get to this goal, but in reality my goal isn't to prove that I can do it, but to prove that I trust my horse and I have worked hard to have a partnership with her.
I had to face some very hard truths this past week. I had to draw a boundary line in what I am willing to be a part of. I cannot say one thing and do another. If I want to truly grow and evolve into a softer trainer I must following my own advice. Everyone has their own journey, and it is up to them to find a way to follow along that path. Sometimes finding the right path is hard and it is never a straight line to get to where you want to be.
I had a friend as me a few days before my demo with Pixie this last week if we were ready. My response was "all I know is that animals keep us humble." Why was that my answer, well because it is the truth. Horses and all animals will keep our ego's in check.
My demo went exactly as I thought, not the way I planned it, lol. Pixie was good, did she do everything I asked? No, she did a lot of her own thing just as I expected. She did stay with me and lucky for me didn't blow me off since I wasn't breathing and I am sure I wasn't being as clear as I should have been. We have had many many better days at bridle-less riding when I wasn't trying to show something to an audience. Why was I nervous to demo something that Pixie and I do all the time? Plain and simple I felt like it if we messed up it would make my training methods look bad. I feel pressured all the time to defend the way I train. I know for the most part people aren't judging as much as I think they are, but that feeling is still there deep inside of me. That is my ego talking, saying you have to prove something when I really don't. And so what if we had messed up, isn't that part of being human. My other half and Willow went out and did a liberty demo too. They were outstanding. Why? Because they didn't have an agenda. No set plan, nothing to prove. They went out and played just like they do when they are alone in the arena. Just as every session should be with our horses.
We get caught up in our agendas when we work with our horses,but we need to remember that just going out and enjoying what we do is the most important part. Our ego's push us to try and prove something to the world causing us to do things we normally wouldn't do. I battle with this all time when it comes to Navi. I find it hard to admit that I struggle with her and her training.
So what happens when we let our ego's take over? My opinion is that we start to use tools in a way we wouldn't normally. Or we use tools such as whips,spurs, etc... I have always been open as to how I feel about these tools and have admitted to the use of them as well. The horse world has become a world of having to prove that you can make your horse perform better than someone else. I am not against showing, but I am against using what ever means necessary to win even if that means hurting the horse. I see it time and time again. The horse doesn't do what is asked so we resort to pain as a way to get what we want. How is that not our ego getting too big. The moment we feel it is okay to cause pain to another living breathing animal because we feel like they have to do something for us so we can prove our worth to another person. Why is it okay to use another animal as a stepping stone for ourselves?
5+ years ago I saw a video of Clinton Anderson and his horse, Mandy, doing a liberty demo and at that moment I said that I wanted to get there with Pixie. Now I can safely say I do not want to be there with Pixie. I want to be different. I want to ride her bridle-less down a trail some day, and I know that day will come (that is my ego talking) . However I also know that it will not go as planned, and we will probably never make it out of the hay field. (And that is how Pixie keeps me humble) I could use force and pain to get to this goal, but in reality my goal isn't to prove that I can do it, but to prove that I trust my horse and I have worked hard to have a partnership with her.
I had to face some very hard truths this past week. I had to draw a boundary line in what I am willing to be a part of. I cannot say one thing and do another. If I want to truly grow and evolve into a softer trainer I must following my own advice. Everyone has their own journey, and it is up to them to find a way to follow along that path. Sometimes finding the right path is hard and it is never a straight line to get to where you want to be.
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